Today was one of the few days I was just ready to cry at the end of.
It started with waking up and feeling like crap. That happens when I go to bed with an ugly migraine. We go to work and we're running a bit late. But i'm not doing anything to try and get to school because I know I'll only be a minute or two behind, and it wasn't like I had a class--just cafeteria duty. I'm a block from the school and as I go through the intersection I notice a car pull out from some mcD's entrance and they stay in the far right lane, I'm on the inside lane. All of a sudden, no warning at all I see a blinker and a white car turning left right in front of me to make a left turn. I'm going 55. The car was lucky I had good brakes because I was dang close. Heart pounding I get to school. I do my duty. I get through one class. One of my attitude problems was being a real @$$ today. and I had other students just doing really peevish things. Like standing there at the pencil sharpener, sharpening and sharpening and sharpening.
9:30 approaches and I need to leave for a quick dr appt. But there is no one to watch the class to ward off destruction and the bell is being held due to some testing going on. I grab someone to watch my class and jet off running just a few minutes behind to get to the eye dr. That went smoothly. ONe of the few things today to do so. I couldn't believe that I was back at school within 35 minutes. Second period, being grateful to not have a sub (they had one for 10 minutes) was mostly okay. Normal pill gets a little too enthused with the idea of four-dimensions (I was explaining and showing with pictures why an x squared cannot be added to an x cubed). Really, I feel grayish hairs forming.
They go, and I have to help get the class next-door started on their work since they had a sub, and math subs are hard to find.... I feel for their teacher sort of. and they kept saying mean things. I finish up and go back to my classroom to prepare for our TAKS Tutorial monday. I'm supposed to try and call parents on failures and stuff, but I suddenly find my conference period gone just trying to get things ready. Actually, I had about ten minutes, but I could feel a migraine and I knew if I didn't take a little break before lunch, my last class would go worse.
Lunch was fine. Eighth period. A class I generally don't look forward to sometimes. I have some sweet kids in there, and it's my smartest group, but it's also a complex group with lots of students needing more individual attention. and I have two pills in there who, by the end of class, I was ready to literally kick their rears out the door. or throw something at them. I almost wrote them up, but that takes time away from the lesson and at that point they were just laying their heads down not paying attention. I told the class at the end that if I see them not taking notes and they can't show me their notes when they want help, I won't help them.
No child left behind can be a good idea for those children that don't want to be left behind. But if you drag a child through kicking and screaming, they are going to be the worse for wear and the others aren't going to reach their full potential. Leave them behind if they don't care. That's my philosophy at times. Other kids want and need my time because they care.
Anyways, It was just a really long and tense day. I'm feeling like a horrible teacher because I'm not organized, at all, not near like I should be (yes i know I can't be perfect my first year) and I have kids who have been trying and still aren't getting things as basic as perimeter--add the sides, and adding like terms. I draw pictures, I relate things as much as I can, and there is some block that just isn't moving. Actually, the ones who are trying are slowly starting to get it. Unfortunately, we have too much to cover before April. and some are getting nasty when I pass back quizzes--for example:
"If you wanted us to combine like terms after multiplying the polynomials, why didn't you put it in the directions"
I taught them from the beginning that when multiplying them they need to combine like terms at the end. But the person who said this slept through the lesson. Tough.
and there's all this UIL stuff I need to be doing and paperwork to fill out for budgeting and stuff.
*drinks more mocha*
oh, and i have a math/sci meet tomorrow, so I don't have a morning break to look forward to tomorrow. and people were behind retards in the parking lot at Starbucks/hastings. Everything, just everything, kept going wrong in little pieces today. I'm afraid to cook. I'll send Josh for Fazoli's i think. and some wine, to help me relax a bit more. I wish our tub was clean enough for me to take a bath. I'd put my contacts in and soak and read and drink tea if so.
But, this is what I signed up for.
Posted by Anna at January 27, 2006 06:01 PM | TrackBack