Twice in the last week or so I've had the chance to think about suicide and it's devastating effects on those left behind. Most recently, a student at the high school died from what was apparently a suicide--which makes me think of all my students current and past--and what I want them to desparately hear and know.
Last week, I was on my way to work when Kidd Kraddick shared a deeply moving and personal story of two people in his life who committed suicide. One was when he was a kid and a friend hung himself--and Kidd was the last one to see him alive. No one knew why, understood what he was thinking. The other person was his nephew this past summer--in what seemed to be a way of not going to jail for a DUI. Kidd shared the emotions of anger, hurt, and confusion at a very selfish thing. But then he said something that really got me thinking. He shared at how irrational suicide is--the person who commits/attempts suicide--it comes from emotion, deep emotion and depression which shuts off, or overrides emotion and rationality. Suicide is irrational--and it's also not something to be mocked--no matter who the person is (in reference to people making fun of Owen Wilson the week before for "not even getting this right.")
That just really had me thinking, especially as I was walking into school after he finished the story. It brought me back to a time in my life where God saved me with rational thought. When I would have the thoughts, the little voice of logic would kick in and I couldn't do it because I realized what it would do to people left behind. In an irrational moment, you can't consider anything but the present moment and your emotions--how sad it is for these people who don't realize that there are people who they will leave behind, there are people who care.
That's something I deeply want my students to know. I care--even those students who have now moved on. I see the potential in their lives--and I know each of them have friends and family who also care.
So the last two weeks have reminded me that I need to keep building a relationship as carefully as I can, and most importantly, I need to be always praying for my students--that if they have thoughts of depression and suicide, to talk to someone--how can someone not care? and I pray that God moves in the same way he protected me when I was their age.
Posted by Anna at September 22, 2007 07:36 AM | TrackBack