Vengeful Cynic

Cincinnati Tour Service

Mmmm.... great day. I got up fairly early and dropped my little brother off at work at Kroger (my former and favorite employer.) After that, I headed back and bummed around and scared up some coffee. Jenny got up and we chatted for a while and headed downtown.

Yes, I am the cheapest bastard in the world and I went and parked at Family Dollar in Covington so I wouldn't have to pay for parking. Wandering around the city for a while was fun and we got to see all of the wonderful baseball-themed art. Jenny also got to see a street named after Pete Rose and several signs about him. She had been curious earlier as to how I even knew who this guy was. Ignorant wenches...

We also got to hit Half-Price Books and Barnes & Noble on the way back before she had to cut out. It sure was a lot of fun showing someone around the place and getting to have a friend in town. I ought to do more of that... when I'm in town myself, that is.

After Jenny left, I picked the little brother back up from work and proceeded to go to a softball game and then bum around with Tim. We spent what should be nearly the last couple of hours working on Dan's computer and then went out to get a late night snack at Applebees'. Again, for the umpteenth time this vacation, I was cursed with a bad waiter.

At least this time, the problem was just that the guy was a rookie. But boy, was he a rookie. Granted, I'm a fairly demanding customer. But come on, 3 refills in 45 minutes? Ridiculous! To make matters worse, he jacked the checks all up, took forever and was never there when you wanted him. He also repeatedly forgot little things like napkins and kept bringing back the wrong drinks. In the end, we tipped him $1 on a $15 tab. Not too shabby considering we were going to just leave 50 cents until we started feeling bad for him.

That's all the news for the day... tune in tomorrow for the last day on sabbatical before the return to Texas.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Bury Me In a Pet Cemetery (thanks Wilson)

Days Until I'm Back at School: 1
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 23
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Cancer for Idiots...

Yes, it's extremely poor taste, I know. And yes, I've had several family members suffer from and die from cancer, so I really don't want anyone bitching about how inconsiderate I am. Just read it for the humor value and for the great new idea it gives me for dealing with idiots. Just ask God (or Santa) to give them all cancer.

Could I pull the trigger?

Could I pull the trigger? Hell yes. To kill? Without question. The first shot might be to maim if I think I can pull it off, but that would only be to make sure I'm not killing a friend or family member. After I verify that, the second bullet is going in. I don't believe in leaving live enemies behind to return to bother me at a later date. A cruel philosophy to be sure, but let's remember who pointed the gun at who first. Don't start something you're not willing to finish.

When would I pull the trigger? Endanger friends, family, loved ones, or maybe even just innocent people. Not sure on that last one, considering that I'm a private citizen and I really don't want to be getting involved in something that is going to get me potentially shot at by the police. But failing that, I think I'd be willing to kill someone to save innocents. Is there a slippery slope involved? Perhaps. Am I making a judgment call as to who lives and dies? Yes. Am I comfortable making this decision? About someone who is trying to kill my friends and family? Definitely. About someone who is trying to kill innocent people? Probably. Will I flinch before I pull the trigger? No... I'll leave the sorting things out to after I am out of potential danger.

Any takers care to take exception to my philosophy? Leave a message after the beep.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Best Tract Ever! (thanks Shem and Damian)

Days Until I'm Back at School: 2
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 24
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Could YOU Pull the Trigger?

Among the more random thoughts that I've had the chance to ponder again this week is this question, "Could you pull the trigger?"

Context? Alright... it's not really essential, but ok. Suppose some nut has a gun pointed at you and you have reason to believe that he'll shoot you if you don't do something... you have a gun pointed at him or have access to a gun and a quick enough draw that you know (or at least strongly suspect) that you could shoot first, would you? Could you?

Some people tell me that they couldn't do it for themselves but they could for a friend, loved one or child. Others say they'd have to think about it or that it would require getting over a lot of emotions. Some people initially say "sure" and then end up following it up with a lot of conditions that would have to be
satisfied before they could do such a thing.

It's a fun question to think about in my mind simply because it's a fairly good indicator of how you respond to extreme situations and how you relate to others. Is it allowable to kill to save a life? Are you allowed to make such a decision? Could you make a decision to kill if given the means and the need?

And another fun question... what do you think my take on this is?

Being a Bum...

I really do love being on vacation... today I did more or less nothing besides bumming around. I helped some friends move stuff, played wiffleball(sp?), went to a church softball game and went swimming with my brothers and some friends from the church youth group. Tomorrow promises to be more of the same with some friends and bumming around the city. I'm thinking we might go wander around downtown, go hit the Loveland castle for Jenny's benefit and go get some coffee. Long and short is that I have half a week left of vacation and plan to stick to slacking.

For my own benefit and yours, a list of things that one should do while in Cincinnati:
1) Go to Skyline
2) Go to a Red's Game
3) Eat Graeter's Iced Cream
4) Drink Jones
5) Eat at Panera (they're everywhere, but it's still good)
6) Go to the Books in Shandon
7) Eat at White Castle
8) Visit Union Terminal
9) See Fountain Square

Incidentally, Damian is updating his blog again (after a year away) and it's very amusing. I suggest you go check it out... especially the wonderful story of the ineptitude of our very own Physical Plant.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Text-Message Divorce?

Days Until I'm Back at School: 3
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 25
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Gay School?

The Cynic Will Exact Vengeance Upon: The New York City School Board

I can't believe this. A school for all gays?!? Someone has gone off their rocker and into the deep end. So now if you're gay you get better treatment than the other children in the school district? I've been down in this part of the world, and the schools suck. So now they have a gay magnet school so they can have some good PR for successful gay students? This is ridiculous.

And just on a side note, it would appear that blogger's date/time system is all jacked up.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Beer for the Homeless

Days Until I'm Back at School: 4
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 26
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Stuff That's Been Bugging Me...

Of late I've been guilty of merely providing a running commentary on the occurences in my life, so I will take a brief break and provide a small commentary on what I've been pondering on of late.

Losing people in your life sucks. If that's just that you move away from them for a couple of months (summer break), for an indefinite period (graduation, withdrawl from school and the like) or for a decidedly longer period (death) it is still a rather tragic occurence especially in the case of a good friend. This is one of the biggest problems with a specialized microcosm like a university. Undoubtedly you will meet many people, some of whom will become your friends. Every year, a group of these people moves away to possibly never be seen again this side of eternity. Every summer, you are separated from many of your friends for several months. And it would seem that nearly every break we have someone die. Granted, there are at least as many meetings as partings in the course of an education, but it would seem that the partings are more memorable because they're more traumatic.

Of course, a place like LeTourneau exacerbates this problem even more than a normal institution. With Bud perennially running the tuition up 5%, people start to be unable to afford the place. Add to that the environment where grace is all but absent in administrative interactions with students and a difficult academic setting that probably admits more students than it should, and you have a recipe for attrition. Not to say I have any grandiose solutions for this problem... I'm just saying it sucks.

Presentation Done...

Got that crazy powerpoint thing done. I think I'm going to burn it to a cd, take it back to Texas and fix it and finalize it on my own computer. A gig of RAM OWNS 256 mb. Oh yeah, and laptop interface sucks.

Aside from going to church today, I went to a party for an old friend from church whom I rarely get to see anymore. It's kind of sad that we so rarely see each other, but she's doing really well and I'm really glad for her and proud of her. Yes, you heard that correctly... people who I've known that long tend to get a bit of "happy treatment" from the Cynic. Just don't go expecting any for yourself, after all I'm a stingy bastard who doesn't give out handouts.

Anyways, so that's that... and I'm looking forward to a visit from Jenny later this week. Hopefully that will help burn through these last couple of days here before I get out to go back to school.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Bowling For Columbine (thanks Anna)

Days Until I'm Back at School: 5
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 27
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Why is the rum gone?

Why is the rum gone?

That's what I'd like to know! This bottle is empty...

brought to you by Quizilla

Well... I just jumped on Moore's bandwagon and took the "Why is the rum gone?" quiz. I hate people who make quizzes that won't show you all of the results... but other than that it's a rather amusing and fairly good quiz.

I got up at a decently early hour today and went to bum around with my parents. Since I'm very rarely home and spending time with them, they even offered to go do the stuff that I wanted to do... which was pretty cool. First, we went up to this cool bookstore in a nearby little podunk town called Shandon. I bought $45 worth of books there (including another copy of The Prince for only $.50) and could have easily bought $100 more. Jonathan and Dr. Johnson would have loved the place... so many quality primary-source books and older histories. Stuff that a library as old as LU's should have but doesn't. You would think that if the LU library doesn't specialize in new stuff and has lots of old stuff, at least it would be good old stuff... and you'd be wrong. The LU library specializes in three things: being quiet, being vacant, and just sucking.

After that we went out to this cool little castle that some crazy old WW1 veteran built out in the middle of Loveland (another little town in the middle of Ohio.) I think he essentially built it because he thought it was cool (logic I can't disagree with) but his stated reasoning was something like this:
America is going to hell in a handbasket (note: the year is 1927) and something must be done, therefore I will re-establish the order of King Arthur and get a group of "knights" together to uphold this code of honor. All knights need a castle to be proper knights, thus I will build a castle.
Personally, I would have just stuck with "castles are cool... living in one would be even cooler... thus I will make a castle to live in." But hey, that's just me... and I wasn't the one educated in France so maybe that's the difference.

Anyways, now I'm back home scanning more pictures to finish up this powerpoint presentation and looking up some new and creative ways to spend money. Don't enjoy the disturbed link too much...

Disturbed Link of the Day: BANG! BANG! BANG! (thanks Stu)

Days Until I'm Back at School: 6
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 28
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

NFL "Diversity"

The Cynic Will Exact Vengeance Upon: The NFL and their "Diversity"

Take a look at this and tell me that something isn't screwed up in the NFL. There is an unofficial decision made to interview at least one minority applicant for a coaching position (lip service)
and then a team is fined for failing to keep up appearances and pay their lip service to diversity. What kind of crap is that?

Look, I will freely admit that there would seem to be a disparity in minority coaches in the NFL. It's the good old boy network to the extreme and it's going to take time. But there is one solution that won't do anything: make all owners try and keep up appearances by interviewing people and then claim that this is an honest attempt at diversity. Either make an honest attempt or at least have the decency to man up and put some real subterfuge to work. Because this is utterly ridiculous...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Best Cuban Raft Ever

Days Until I'm Back at School: 7
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 29
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Being a Bum...

Another wondeful day of vacation wherein I got up at the bright and early hour of noon after going to bed at 2 am. You all wish you were this lucky (except David, who has been doing this all summer.) I woke up to a fresh pot of coffee being brewed and generally being left alone for the first 10 minutes of being up. Granted, this is less time than I like being left alone, but when at home with my two brothers and parents there is only so much one can demand. Plus, it was only my mom and she usually demands little in the morning, especially when I've just gotten up.

Anyways, reading blogs I am once again reminded that people shouldn't start arguments with people like Jonathan if they're not willing to back up said arguments with anything other than empty rhetoric, strong words and the occasional insult. I tried to get the perma-links and it failed... so used the link to the pages instead.

Incidentally, I'm about fed up with Blogger permalinks. It's going to be stab time here really soon. I'm thinking that as soon as I can get back to my room to cancel my Camelot account, I'm going to start channeling the resulting cash towards payments for webspace and setting up a blog and a page out on the open 'net.

I'll probably be sitting here all afternoon scanning pictures and the like, so holler at me if you're so inclined.

Disturbed Link of the Day: "Star Wars Kid" Sues (here's the actual video)

Days Until I'm Back at School: 8
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 4
and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 30
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Perkins

The Cynic and His Crew Exacted Vengeance Upon: Perkins

Last night my best friend, youngest brother and I had the joy of going out to eat at the local Perkins. I had a nagging thought in the back of my head that this might not be the best idea ever considering that the last time I had been there the service hadn't been so hot. Regardless, just about all alternatives for late-night dining were closed and so we went. In hindsight, we should have gone to Big Boy.

We knew it was going to be an interesting night when the greeter started talking. He seriously sounded like he was taking estrogen supplements and was about 40 years old and female as opposed to late-20s to early-30s and male. The demeanor and carriance indicated that he was an incredibly out-of-place (and out-of-costume) drag queen. The cognitive dissonance was such that I couldn't stop glancing back over at him every time he talked, but I wouldn't say that it really bothered me. The same could not be said for my companions who couldn't stop giggling every time he talked... which provided for amusement as our dining experience consisted of 2 hours of mostly waiting. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

We were seated and the waitress arrived about 15 minutes later... wonderful. We placed our orders and waited another 15 minutes for my coffee and their waters to actually show up. Mind you, Perkins coffee is toxic and I really didn't feel like coffee especially, but the trick is that when you get coffee you also get a pot of coffee to keep yourself going. So about 20 minutes later, I still had half a pot of nasty coffee that needed four sugars per cup to make it drinkable, but my counterparts were out of water.

Now, when this particular little motley crew feels neglected and ignored by the server, boredom kicks in and destructiveness is the rule. After I had used all of the sugar at our table in my coffee, it was decided that the sugar should be replenished... with the salt. That accomplished, Tim took a little single-serving creamer and squeezed it into a cup, wherein it practically exploded. Eyes bright with excitement, he and Jonny each grabbed a creamer to replicate the process on the underside of an adjacent table. Yes, I know, it was destructive and juvenile. I already told you that... but we were bored and had been there for the better part of an hour without so much as a whiff of our food and only 2 visits from the waitress (1 to get our orders, 1 to deliver our only round of drinks.)

So, an hour and a half in, our food arrived. And it was cold and terrible. How you make someone wait for an hour and a half for cold food I'm not sure, but we choked it down and the quality was reflective of our experience up until that point. And, yes, it was still go time. Perkins had invoked the wrath of the vengeful diners and there would be no getting out of it by serving us bad food in an untimely manner! The syrup was tempered with Tobasco, the Tobasco with salt and the surrounding environs were decorated with a coat of creamer, delivered in a manner most satisfactory to the erstwhile painters. I will note at this point that I did none of this, I merely made suggestions. I do have some level of decency, my best friend a lesser level, and my youngest brother virtually none.

Unfortunately, at some point we ran out of ammunition. Having destroyed every condiment within 2 tables of our own and growing anxious of discovery, we began casting anxiously about for our waitress. And after another 15 minutes or so of that, I went hunting for her to demand my bill. We'd been here for over 2 hours at this point and my companions were threatening to take things to the level of physical demolition at this point. After a 5-minute trek through the restaurant and another run-in with our lost drag queen, I found the waitress and managed to get her to give me my bill.

I should take this moment to note as an aside that I know how hard food service is and that late-night dining restaurants are a poor combination of terrible customers, bad understaffing and useless help. And really, I could see that our waitress was being overworked to the extreme last night, but I began to suspect that part of this was a simple lack of caring. I mean, really, if you aren't going to at least try and get back to me with water 15 minutes after I request it, your tip will suffer.

In the end, we vastly over-tipped by leaving a dollar tip (mostly out of guilt on my part) on a $25 tab and left. Jonny half-heartedly suggested lighting the place on fire but I really couldn't see what good that would do beyond forcing the owner to actually put money into the place. As we sped off into the night, I vowed never to return there if for no other reason than they might have figured out who added Tobasco to every syrup server within our section. Yes, it was immature but it was also 2 am and we were getting no service at all... what do you expect from a group of two bored college students and a bored high schooler?

Busily Scanning Pictures...

Well, at least I've got something to do to keep me busy for a couple of hours tomorrow. My brothers went with the church youth group on a retreat and they're doing a picture slide-show on Sunday. My return to town has prompted people to remember that I am a technologist and that I can set up this sort of thing on a computer and run it through a projector. Thusly, I have been nominated to scan several hundred pictures tomorrow and set up said presentation for Sunday. Should be interesting anyways.

Now if only I had webspace to put some of said pictures on to amuse you all...

Just incidentally, I think that humans have something to learn from this beetle. We have a long way to go before our society is that advanced.

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Mythical State

Days Until I'm Back at School: 9
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 31
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Emotions...

Just before I go to bed I have a little bit of musing. Is it easier to be motivated when there is a strong emotion driving you? I know that in recent memory the only times I was ever motivated for much is when a bit of anger started driving at me. I wonder if it's the same for other emotions...

I'm starting to suspect that it is... any thoughts from those of you with real motivation?

Seize the Carp!

Well... I'm up and I finally have some sleep and hopefully that means I'm going to be able to more peacefully and clear-headedly interact with my world. I guess it's time to "Carpe the diem! Seize the carp!" - Out Cold

As soon as the stupor of sleep wears off, I will try and post a coherant thought or two. This will probably be after going clothing shopping (an activity which I loathe) so bear that in mind. I might have decided that this exercise in fueling my Chauvinism along with an interaction with the general public is a case-study justification in the euthanizing of most high school girls. Or maybe not... time will tell.

Random thought of the moment: If the saying "no brain, no headache" is true, why do women get headaches?

New Sandals!

Shopping went more or less without incident due to the fact that I wasn't really feeling up to shopping and thusly I was more in a hurry to get out than ever. In my haste, I still managed to note several teenaged girls who were working through the same rack of clothes for the entirety of the hour or so that I was there. In that time I managed to get new shorts, shirts, button-down shirts and two new pairs of sandals whilst they managed to find and discard one or two racks of clothing... from what I could tell. Maybe there's some precise science at work there.... I doubt it.

Being home is really starting to bore the piss out of me and even moreso that I really don't feel like being in town. The larger curse is that between reading books like a madman, watching movies and goofing around on a computer, I still can't manage to keep myself distracted. It may just be that I'm not very good at being an introvert when I'd like to be around people and am so used to having people around. After all, at school there's always someone to go do something with and I rarely have to just kill time by myself. I miss that and want it back.

Anyways, enough about my being a pathetic excuse for an introvert... here's the link and the stats.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Ode to Bad Commercial Art

Days Until I'm Back at School: 10
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 4
and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 32
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Ethics vs. Scruples

Several of my friends and I were having an interesting conversation about situational ethics. Namely, what is the basis for an ethical standard? Now, for a Christian this sounds like a fairly straightforward Sunday School answer: "the Bible." But think about it, is it that you do what you should do based strictly on a biblical standard and if so, is it just based on the spirit of the Word or on Levitical law? Take the question a step further: assume that a perfectly legitimate activity (ethically) is made against the law by the government that you live under... do you follow the law or continue on as you have? What happens when it's something like handgun ownership where you feel that it would be wiser to keep the gun if it weren't against the law?

Personally, at least in the past I was very rarely driven by ethics or "moral standards" but rather by my own standards which I referred to scruples. The basic difference in my lingo is this: ethics are based on an absolute external standard and scruples are merely actions taken in order to keep one from getting into trouble. Put simply, my scruples are intended to keep me out of jail and from getting arrested while ethics are to keep a level of moral decency. Currently, scruples take a back burner to ethics because many of my scruples are simply watered-down attempts at ethics that don't hamper my life as much.

A simple contrast of ethics and scruples. Ethics say don't lie and if one digs, one could even come up with a reasoning behind this imperative rooted in not deceiving and hurting others that resolves to the Golden Rule (do unto others as you would have them do unto you.) On the other hand, scruples say don't lie when you don't have to and if you have to, be good enough to not get caught. This scruple is based on life experience that the more you lie, the harder it is to keep the truth straight in your own head and the easier it is to have the whole damned house of cards come collapsing down around you. If it were expedient, scruples would have no problem with lying to everyone all of the time so long as one wasn't caught.

Of late I have come to this conclusion: ethics have a place and a reason otherwise our benevolent and omniscient God wouldn't have created His ultimate standard of perfection. A proper understanding of the character of God (probably the reason that it took so long for me) causes one to quickly come to this conclusion and thusly understand that in the end a failure to uphold this standard will result in hurting oneself or someone else. Of course, if one cares nothing for others or God ethics are largely pointless... therein the great gap between theists and everyone else. If the end all and be all is merely self, what reason for empathy or sympathy? Altruism is an idiotic farce by this standard and the only law of the land is to perpetuate self and continue living a good life. Scruples promote this and ethics merely get in the way... and thus you understand the existance and place of both sets of standards.

I Need to Sleep In!

I went to bed at 3 am last night after going out with my friend Tim to see a movie and bumming around and talking with him until 2 am or so. The general plan was that due to the sleep defecit created by getting up for work last week and perpetuated by a 6 am wake-up for travelling followed by a 8 am wake-up for chuch, I was going to sleep until I woke on my own. Sadly, this was not to be.

At 9 am this morning I was shaken awake by my mother and informed that she had rescheduled my dentist appointment (formerly scheduled for when I was going to be out of town) to this morning and that I needed to get up to be at the dentist's in an hour. Granted, she had just asked them to get me a cancellation and she had been informed only an hour before myself... but still. I REALLY hadn't wanted or planned on getting up before about noon today and thus was in a fairly grumpy and tired mood. To make matters worse, after speeding to make a 20 minute drive in 10 to make said appointment, they were 15 minutes late on my appointment. Stupid dentists... at least I didn't have any cavities.

Oh, and this evening was made eventful by referring to a "dumbass idea" as I was distracted and who should hear me say this but my mother. The sparks flew my way and I quickly and sheepishly apologized. I really need to get my brain focused on keeping me out of harm's way while I'm at home; this would have never happened in high school. Anyways, check out the jacked up link and thank the Good Lord that you live in America (unless you don't and then pray that you might be delivered here.)

Disturbed Link of the Day: British Judges Suck (c/o Wilson)

Days Until I'm Back at School: 11
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 33
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Church at Home!

I got to go to my home church today. I keep forgetting what good preaching I have at home. While the worship can be a bit lacking from time to time, it's mostly good and even when it's a bit skimpy, the sermon more than makes up for it. I really have loved Saint Mike's, I just wish that they would find a permanent priest and that he could preach well. The problem now is that they're getting every guest priest in the diocese and some of them are good preachers and some of them preach the worst 5-minute homily ever.

My brothers get back from their church trip today and that should be interesting. I've really missed them and look forward to spending some time with them. As I've referenced in the past, my parents have been split for over a year and need prayers. It looks like they're really trying to work on getting back together and have gone to a shrink and all of that, so ongoing prayer is greatly appreciated. All that to say is that it's really good to be home and I just hope that things are going to work out in my immediate family so that I can feel comfortable coming home again.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Birds of a Feather

Days Until I'm Back at School: 12
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 34
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

My Policy on Idiots...

Incidentally, I am working on my policy on idiots so leave a comment if you have an idea. Right now I'm trying to determine if idiots are more of a product of their environment or their genetics and if the former, how to prevent idiots from raising idiot children (until I have the means of disposing of adult idiots.)

Homeward Bound...

I do believe this is the second time I've left for home and really not been looking forward to anything other than the return. It should be a good two weeks, but I really just don't want to leave for two weeks. Incidentally, it's morning and I'm tired... but at least I can sleep on the plane.

Done Flying for Now...

Well... I'm back home. Aside from stupid mechanics and the fact that my ride was held up on her way to the airport by traffic for an air show, it was a fairly uneventful trip.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Relationship Gone Horribly Wrong

Days Until I'm Back at School: 13
Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34 and holding
Days Until Summer is Over: 35
Days Since it Last Rained : who cares?

Fly Away...

I did the work, I'm about to do the packing... and then I'm out of here as of bright and early this morning.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Liberian Soldiers in Drag (courtesy of Wilson)

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 34
Days Until Summer is Over: 36
Days Since it Last Rained : 5

Which Nerd are You?

Which one of these are you?

Tired of Vacation

Well ladies and gents... 3 hours of work and some packing and cleaning stand between myself and a 2-week vacation. I am definitely going to enjoy my two weeks off from work and the ability to bum around like a champ, but I wish that it could be with all of my fellow Bandits and Honors comrades. Anyways, all that to say is that I'm tired and beat down and ready for a vacation from work but I'm getting tired of vacation from my friends.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Old Man Can't Drive

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 33
Days Until Summer is Over: 37
Days Since it Last Rained : 4

Odd Little Game

Check this odd little game out.

Texas Shakespeare Rocks!

I went to Kilgore College to see the Texas Shakespeare Festival's performance of "Comedy of Errors." It rocked... I think I might even pay $20 again to go see it if I wasn't going home this weekend. If you have the chance, I definitely recommend checking it out. Not a whole lot went on today besides that: work or otherwise... I just hope to get the rest of my work (or at least a good chunk of it) done tomorrow so I can be off on Friday.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Naked Paintball?

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 32
Days Until Summer is Over: 38
Days Since it Last Rained : 3

Give me Warped Links!

Yet another groggy post from the land of "5 minutes before work." You'll note that at least it's on time this morning, but that's not the point...

I'm going to be asking for a bit of help on the contributions to warped links for the next 2 weeks. I'm going to be home and ostensibly spending less time on my computer, less time posting, and more time out with friends. Granted, I'm sure my brothers will be able to contribute some warped links but there are only so many of the same sites about retards that you want to see... believe me. To that end, be sure to send me odd links that you come across (especially if you wouldn't post them yourself but think I would) and I'll see that they get posted and you get credit.

Blogger Still Hates Me!

Well... it would appear that Blogger doth not love me as I attempt to load my page tonight... And as it prepares to rain outside, I would remind Anna that it doesn't rain in East Texas in July.

Disturbed Link of the Day: 2-inch Waist Corset (blocked for no reason I can discern)

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 31
Days Until Summer is Over: 39
Days Since it Last Rained : 2

Trying to Wake Up...

I don't know what's gotten into me, but it seems as though I need more and more sleep of late. Last night i went to bed around 12:30 and got up at 10. This is after 4 or 5 days of getting 8+ hours of sleep. I hope I'm not turning into the narcaleptic Gecko.

Here's something to amuse you as I head off to work... it seemed to be the kind of comic that befits a man of my outlook on life.

Got Wench?

Alright, so I've had this great idea for a long time and I think I can now manage to afford it and set it up using Brunetto T-Shirts.

The general gist of the idea is to make a t-shirt with "Got wench?" printed on the front of it in the same font of the "Got milk?" ads. Now all I need to do is dig up the font and do some sampling with it to figure out how I'd like it to look. Incidentally, minimum order is 10 and while I'd love to have 10 of these shirts, the cost might be a bit much. It's looking like the cost per shirt will be under $10, so if you're interested in getting in on some of these wonderful shirts, let me know.

A note on the disturbed link: at first glance the page just looks a tad odd, not disturbed. But take a closer look and you'll realized that just about every frog looks smacked out of his respective mind and there are also several products that could easily double as shot-glasses and bongs.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Lilly Pad Store

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 30
Days Until Summer is Over: 40
Days Since it Last Rained : 1

NASCAR

I would like to post in solidarity with Randy on the topic of NASCAR. For my part, I must admit with a smug grin that I am a yankee in good-standing and as such don't have family (that I will claim) that have an inclination to watch this retarded "sport." Granted, everyone can claim from a perspective that most sporting events are lacking in entertainment value, skill requirement, physical exertion and the like, but NASCAR really takes the cake.

Physical exertion? Even the roughest driving conditions imaginable aren't that physically exerting. There is definitely a mental level here, but if that's your only claim to fame, go drag chess into the ring. At least there is a good deal of skill required here, so I can give them credit... this doesn't make it a sport persay, but at least I can allow that they are competing. The biggest beef I have with NASCAR, besides the fact that it isn't any more of a sport by any definition that I can figure than mowing the lawn, is that it's SO BORING. Some of you would say the same about baseball, and you're entitled to your opinion... but come on, 300 laps on the same course with only the occasional wreck to liven things up? That's ridiculous.

Anyways, that's my take on NASCAR. Indy-car, stock-car and other-car are more or less the same. I'll tolerate drag-racing, because it's a quarter mile and around about the time I get bored, they're done.

Limbaugh on NFL Countdown?

Rush on NFL Countdown?

I love Rush as much as the next conservative and I love football as much as any other red-blooded American and while I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a publicity stunt, it will at least be interesting.

BOW DOWN!

You may now bow before your Geek-Lord.

Good Day!

Moore has a great disturbed link up. Go check it out.

It's been a fairly good and pleasant day, even by my standards: good food, good friends and good fun.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Woman vs. Cockroach

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 29
Days Until Summer is Over: 41
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

LU's Warped Links

Reading up on some LU Blogs, the need to do this overcame me.

Homegrown warped links:

The Brit's Famous Ass
Airplane Porn

Is Summer Beating You Down?

To those of you whose asses are being kicked by the summer, let me offer you this bit of encouragement. Today is 7/12

Assuming you are coming back for IMPACT, (I think) you have to be back on 8/14. Assuming you are not, you are back 8/24 (if you follow the rules.)

According to this math, you personally have anywhere from 33 to 43 days before you are back here... which is just over a month. Assuming you want to come back a bit early, I will find somewhere for you to stay* until you can check in... you have my word. Lest you think this bit of empathy and kindness is out of the ordinary, allow me to explain:

Last summer, I was ready to be done before the summer even started. My dad moved out in March and the last place I wanted to be was at home dealing with this. Within the first couple of weeks at home, word came back that Rebekah Gamwell, a good friend of mine, had died in a car accident. I never did find a well-paying, steady job: I settled for temp agency work and Kroger, often going for a week or two between jobs. In short, summer sucked hard.

So if you're just ready to be done with summer, or if it's beating the living hell out of you, let me know. We'll see what we can do for you.*

*Note: These housing arrangements shall be in no way construed to be anything less than in full compliance with LeTourneau University policy and will be in only those places sanctioned by Residence Life Staff, the Trustees, Bud, and the Pope.

I Make a Better Despot...

I tried taking Wilson's What Western Ruler Are You quiz. Problem is, I really don't get anyone whom I even remotely resemble. I guess I just wouldn't make a successful Western Ruler... I don't have enough optimism or trust in people. I think I'd make a better totalitarian...

I've been thinking about the coming year and stuff and I'm realizing more and more that I'm going to realy miss having Cowboy around. Last year during Philosophy of Death, it was talking with Cowboy for an hour after class and getting all of the related stress out of my system that enabled me to take that class without turning into a homicidal maniac. This spring, wandering with
Cowboy and talking with him was one of the greater pleasures of the semester. He seems to have a unique perspective on life that agrees with mine and yet is
completely different. I could really use that refreshingly insightful perspective right about now...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Stonehenge and Sex?

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 28
Days Until Summer is Over: 42
Days Since it Last Rained : 3

It's Late... But It's Here!

Well... I'm back late again, but before I sleep I guess I'll do the disturbed link... I can't let down the peoples.

Disturbed Link of the Day: It's Raining Electronics

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 26
Days Until Summer is Over: 44
Days Since it Last Rained : 1

Wench Management Course

To clarify, there are two separate things involving Wench Management that I am supporting:

1) Course-work at LU corresponding with a semester with Phys Plant Custodial
2) Wench Training Consulting

The former would be, of course, part of the normal LU course-work for wenches. The latter, on the other hand, is a specialized business in which I am involved in order to propogate the occurence of well-trained young ladies within society. You will note that your typical LU wench is not a lady and a good number of your run-of-the-mill wenches outside of the bubble aren't either. My training program can change all of that.

Rates are available on demand and take into account the current state and skillset of the wench in question. Talk to me for LU student discount and referral bonuses.

Summertime and the Living is Easy

Well... it's Friday. A happy day, a glorious day, and a day that I didn't work a single minute. Fun times. This is what summer is about: bumming around, doing nothing, chilling out with friends and enjoying life. I just wish I could get payed to do this rather than painting.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Brides For Sale

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 27
Days Until Summer is Over: 43
Days Since it Last Rained : 2

Two Warped Links!

You'll note that due to my late return to my apartment last night, you were deprived of yesterday's link of the day. Fear not, you will get two this morning to make up for it and then the usual this evening. Oh, and Edge weekend is this weekend for those of you who care about such things.

Disturbed Links of the Day:
A class I wish LU offered
Topic for a new Honors history elective

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 25
Days Until Summer is Over: 44
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

Wench Training Consulting

I have a new idea for LU to better prepare students for life.

Upon arrival at LU, all wenches must spend 10 hours a week for one semester working with the Physical Plant custodial crew. This will enable them to be better women.

Think about it... custodial crew teaches many of the valuable things that a wench needs to know how to do: cleaning windows, scrubbing floors, vacuuming, cleaning bathrooms, washing sinks, cleaning up after people... this job is the one of the best wench-training tools ever. If every LU wench worked there for at least one semester they could gain many of the skills necessary for doing woman's work. Granted, many will still need to learn cooking, gardening and the art of caring for her man, but that's what specialized Wench Training Consultants are here for... assuming that a man can't train his wench himself.

Incidentally, the Cynic is a specialized Wench Training Consultant with a great resume, exceptional skill, and affordable prices. Please don't hesitate to call...

Rough Times at Phys. Plant...

You know it's going to be a rough day when you're just waking up and looking for something on your computer only to stop for a second and realize that you've never had that file - it was just in a dream last night. Alright, so nerds dream about computer stuff sometimes, so shoot me.

At least I'm not dreaming about chess anymore... usually...

Update: It's lunch time... I just worked Grounds Crew all morning and I'm hot, sweaty, tired and staring in a blank stupor off into space.

Disturbed Links for All!

It would appear that Wilson has taken to posting disturbed links on his own now. Hey, more disturbed links are better. Even Ardith got in on the action the other day. This pleases me and makes me happy... in a sick and sadistic kind of way.

Note: Blogger perma-links are kinda screwy... the post referenced should appear at the very top of your browser window.

Before someone beats me to the punch on Hulk...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Hulk Doll upsets parents

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 24
Days Until Summer is Over: 45
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

On Loss...

Something I jotted down on the curse of LU summers...

How do you deal with the loss of a friend?
How do you cope when hope comes to an end?
Do you sigh? Do you sob? Do you break down and cry?
Or do you resolve yourself to just asking Him why?
Remember The hope lost is less than the hope that is found.
In the end, in eternity, is where hope is sound.

It just seems that every damned summer, I lose more friends. Here's to hoping that summer finds you well and remember that in just over a month school starts again. That's the thought dragging me through the summer.

Look, I'm a shitty poet... I don't need you to tell me that. It just expresses my sentiments on the matter and I'll thank you to leave it alone. Otherwise, I'll illustrate how much better I am at profane and derisive limericks.

Kill One to Save Many...

Sitting here and thinking about watching Trigun like I have incessantly of late, the great Machiavellian question of the greatest good comes up. But Trigun stands that question on its head and perverts it a bit. Rather than, "kill one innocent for the good of many" it's "take one life to save those of many." The sad thing is that the initial stance of the series completely fails to take into account the circumstances involved and the guilt of the life in question.

For instance, if there is a trained assassin who will kill anyone who gets between him and his target, this individual is obviously a liability. Rather than allowing multiple people to die at his hands, his life should be forfeit. Granted, given enough time you can incapacitate him so that he cannot kill anymore, but the odds are good that in that time, he will kill more innocents. I would kill him the first chance I got, before he had a chance to do his worst.

Is this playing God? Probably. On the other hand, the question of the ends justifying the means is typically a thorny one. However, when given circumstances that are this easy to rectify and the means is killing a murderer to justify an end result of saving countless lives, this just isn't a rough decision. At least, not in my pragmatic and Machiavellian mind.

Call Me Happy Again...

To end off the evening... I've been accused of being some variety of happy of late. You people have pushed me to the limit. Feel the wrath of the Cynic with three disturbed links:

Link 1 (blocked)
Link 2 (blocked)
Link 3

You may only continue to call me happy after linking and exploring the above
sites.

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 23
Days Until Summer is Over: 46
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

Stalkers are My Friends

It strikes me that it's been a while since I've linked up a comic. And this one seems to be about right.

The scariest thing about this is that I have more friends like Mike than I care to admit. Granted, I would have killed Kharisma (or given her advise to step out in front of a car) years ago, but I would probably also encourage Mike to keep stalking her. I guess I'm just a cruel individual who would take a stalker for a friend over a self-absorbed (albeit good-looking) wench any day.

Flight Plans Finalized

Well, I've gotten most of the to-do list that I had to get done out of the way today. My flight plans to Cincinnati are set up, my check problems with the Business office are cleared up, my vaccination paperwork is filed with the nurse, and the ball is rolling on my registration.

Incidentally, I'll be leaving 7/19 and returning 8/2. If I bother formatting the html so that it looks right in blogger, I might even post my itinerary.

Linking Fun...

Well it looks like the Maria J pastel eyesore is no more. Behold... the new Maria J blog.

Update: allegedly Maria is discontinuing this new blog as well... right after I went to the effort to link it too. Go figure.

Anyways, down to the data of the day... and to make up for the disturbed link of the other day I would even recommend this link to people like Anna.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Star Spangled Ice Cream

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 22
Days Until Summer is Over: 47
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

Emotional Self-Defense

Yay for another pseudo-intellectual blog post... if you don't like these, cease reading now.

I am always slightly amused by the variations in my own personality when it comes to interacting with people. I am fond of quoting sayings such as "nice guys finish last" and breaking out my own cynical and chauvinist rhetoric. This veneer along with the well-practiced routine of quips and wise-cracks tends to stay up throughout about 95% of my interactions with the outside world.

Sooner or later, some people hang around me to the point where they realize that the veneer isn't as solid as it appears at first glance and there really is a depth hidden behind the iron-clad veneer. Depending on how trustworthy an individual is deemed, they manage to see beyond the initial barrage of sarcasm and smartass remarks to at least some well thought-out sarcastic insights. This is where nearly all of the remaining 5% lives.

Finally, there is a remaining 1% of people who know me very well. Somehow they've managed to get past the hard exterior and the seemingly vicious reactions to outsiders and see a bit into the real Cynic. I'm not sure how this happens, but it does from time to time. Oddly enough, one of the fastest ways to get there is to be in the middle of an emotional crisis in my presence. For all of my hard talk, I can't stand to see a friend in pain... especially if they start crying. Tears are my own personal kryptonite. While years may get someone into my trust, transparency and honesty in hardship are things that seem to bypass all of my cynicism and skepticism.

Granted, there are manipulative witches out there who could use this to their advantage and indeed have in the past. You'd be amazed at the quality acting that some wenches can pull off. But eventually, the truth will come out... and be wary of the vengeance of angry and betrayed men. If there was a case where I'd hit a female, this would be it. After all, there's a special place in hell for manipulative witches, and I'm sure it's full of rapists and pedophiles.

Anyways, I'm not sure what prompted all of that... maybe remembering my ex, the manipulative bitch and the hellish relationship that was started on the 4th between my Senior year in high school and my Freshman year here. All that to say is, well, um.... yeah....

Which LU Prof Are You?

I really do hate polls. I especially hate polls where I end up with the same result as the guy I took them from. Not that this poll isn't rigged so that 2/7 of the answers aren't ever going to be used (I mean, who really wants to be Otwell or Batts) but still... the accompanying pictures and text are really good. You should go check them out.

Which LeTourneau Professor Are You?

Dr. Andy Woodring, Biblical Studies

brought to you by Quizilla

Thank you for spending the time on putting the fun pictures together and doing up the quiz Shem.

4th of July Fun!

Well, due to a lack of anything else interesting around here and a good offer by my roommate D, I went up to visit his family about 20 minutes north of town. They fed me home-made brisket, barbeque beans and sausage.... it was REALLY good. I can't help but wishing my mom lived a bit closer after a visit like that. Afterwards we bummed around and shot off some fireworks and then went to Ore City to watch the fireworks. I have to admit, they weren't a big city production, but they were top-notch for a little town and much better than I had anticipated. If I'm ever in town for the 4th again, I'm going back to Ore City.

Incidentally, I think I'm going home for two weeks at the end of the month to whom it may concern. Where I go from there is anyone's guess, but two weeks is about the limit that I can stay at home and still feel like I'm visiting rather than becoming re-assimilated. This may be a good or bad thing, but this summer I really don't feel like going home to stay, so to speak.

I will comment on the disturbed link as if you are female and/or one of my more gentle readers, you really shouldn't go to this link. And if you do, don't say I didn't warn you...

Disturbed Link of the Day: Why The Sea is Salty

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 20
Days Until Summer is Over: 49
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

The Shot is Done...

This guy has quite possibly the best job ever.

And this guy's blog never ceases to amaze and amuse me every time I read it.

Incidentally, the shot went off without a hitch short of my bleeding all over my shirt immediately afterwards. I highly recommend the Gregg County Health Clinic to anyone in or near Longview who needs shots. The shots are free and the people who give them are very good at what they do.

Disturbed Link of the Day: The Crystal Children

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 19
Days Until Summer is Over: 50
Days Since it Last Rained : 0

Needles...

It's the morning, I'm tired and all of that. Much as I would have liked to get that shot yesterday, it still looms big in my forecast today. Thinking back, I don't think I can remember but one or two shots that I didn't loathe entirely: some Hepatitus B shots that I had to get back in junior high. The rest of them have been miserable events to say the least.

I can still remember the first shot I had to get in conscious memory. I don't remember why it was such a traumatic ordeal (other than that they were poking me with a needle) to start with, but my father was teasing me about it for about a year prior to it and my brothers caught on. I seem to remember them making up some stupid little ditty with which to torment me in reference to this event. And they wonder why shots bug me. After they stuck me with the needle, they had to give me smelling salts to prevent me from fainting.

Next event on record (as best as I can figure) would be somewhere around age 10 or 12 I had to get a cholesterol test. This isn't as bad as a shot, it's worse. Especially when the pathetic nurse pricked my thumb with a lancet and was trying to milk a thimbleful of blood out of it. This process took at least a minute and it was sickening me quickly to watch her nurse my blood out of my arm. I started getting queasy and warned her that I was going to throw up. She didn't listen and kept milking and sure enough boom! all over the stupid nurse. She deserved it. On the other hand, come to think of it, it may be bad karma from this even that keeps getting me barfed on. Anyways... suffice to say it wasn't a pretty sight.

Now, I've never been overseas to the point that I needed extra vaccination, and I've never needed allergy shots. I think if either were true of me, I'd probably have gone crazy. Beyond these events, there was the Hepatitus B shot where the nurse left the needle sitting in my arm for an extra 5 seconds and I nearly killed her or the anesthesia IV that kept falling out as I was prepped for having my wisdom teeth removed... so suffice to say I've got a wonderful track record with needles. Sounds like lots of fun and games in store for today, let me tell you what...

Donate to Fix Cars!

If your summer job is providing you more cash than you usually see during an entire school year, take some time and a few bucks to donate to repairing Dunny and Hellmuth's cars. Oh, and if you have any information on the "glue-sniffing asshole" I'm sure Dunny would love to hear about it.

No Shot for Me... Yet

Here's an idiot to euthanize.

I worked a full 8 hours today and tried very hard to get a tetanus shot. Unfortunately, shots are only available at the Gregg County Health Clinic from 12:30 to 4 and I got there are 4:30. So I guess it's not 8 hours tomorrow... oh darn (hear the sadness in my voice.)

Disturbed Link of the Day: White Trash World (blocked)

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 18
Days Until Summer is Over: 51
Days Since it Last Rained : 6

I need a Shot...

Some days I love my parents and some days I hate them. Someone needs to make me go get a tetanus shot and follow up on finishing registering for classes. I also probably ought to be going to work more than I am. Some days it's rough being a slacker who knows that he should get off his butt and get things done. Well, if I go to bed now, life will be better than if I go to bed later.

And the RA made tomorrow room inspection day as of this morning.

Disturbed Link of the Day: Slo Mo

Days of Living in a Shitty Apartment: 17
Days Until Summer is Over: 52
Days Since it Last Rained : 5

Cops On Hand at 5AM

I was rudely awakened at 5 AM to the sound of banging on the door. The worst part is that while this was an annoyance to me, it was nothing compared to the wonderful news that the cop had for Sam and Dunny that their cars had been broken into.

For those in administration who keep telling us that fences discourage an open community, I have this challenge. Come park alongside us and do what you would encourage us to. Let's see just how long your attitude stays this way when your car is broken into, your friend's is stolen and your roommate's is vandalized. What does it say when nearly every laundry change machine on campus has been stolen at some point or another. It tells me that open community is for the birds. I want guard towers with armed guards. Give security a handgun and a shotgun and let's weed out the local ingrates. At the very least, electrify the fence... what's left of it anyways.