Word.

acetylsalicylicatorily

Some fun trivia (courtesy of http://members.aol.com/gulfhigh2/words11.html)

PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS (45 letters; a lung disease caused by breathing in certain particles) is the longest word in any English-language dictionary. (It is also spelled -koniosis.)

And, a personal favorite of mine:
DONAUDAMPFSCHIFFAHRTSELEKTRIZITAETENHAUPTBETRIEBSWERKBAUUNTERBEAMTENGESELLSCHAFT (80 letters). This German word translates as "the club for subordinate officials of the head office management of the Danube steamboat electrical services"

Fun stuff, that.

"Dulce Et Decorum Est" by Wilfred Owen (quoted from my English Lit II textbook)

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks, Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge, Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs And towards our distant rest began to trudge. Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind; Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots Of disappointed shells that dropped behind.

GAS! Gas! Quick, boys!-- An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And floundering like a man in fire or lime.--
Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,--
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

And, on a completely unrelated note, how would one sculpt an ithyphallic retromingent?

Is it the Universalists who believe "once saved, always saved" or do I have the wrong sex?

That should be "sect" . . .

Today as I was using Google,
That modern search engine diesel,
I found much to my stupefaction:
Mustela nivalis, a weasel.

And speaking of weasels, why aren't you letting sexy pedestrians comment? What do you have against coquettish walkers, anyway? You, sir, are a fascist and a regular regno tyrannus.

From Adam Brooks Webber's Modern Programming Languages: A Practical Introduction:

Let Us Go Down and Confuse Their Speech
It starts with isolation. After all,
If I could know your mind and feel your pain,
And undergo the workings of your brain--
It happens by induction. When you fall
You say the word. I hear and I recall
How falling felt. The meaning seems quite plain.
You sing, I soar; I thirst, you pray for rain.
But that prayer echoes from the temple wall
And, mumbled from mouth to mouth, develops fine
Distinctions, many meanings, low and high,
Some true, some false, all diffferent, each one fits.
I say: I hope you'll have your God assign
His language its semantics. You reply:
And I, you, yours, His its.

So yeah... that's the first time I've ever seen a CS textbook writer wax philosophical. I was amused. It's the PostScript to my programming languages text.

Cattus Receptus

Great darkness sat enthroned that night,
Both man and turtle quelled,
But still there crept a quivering light,
Which man and salt beheld,

The moose, that mammoth royal beast,
Bent down his sniffling nose,
But everywhere the ice-cream feast,
Was lost beneath the snows,

Oh brave daylight, where have you hid,
You presence we have missed,
We pine in darkness, goat and kid,
Last hope we have dismissed,

But northward strides a bold bright star,
At first it traipsed, now look!
Its massive steps have brought it far,
Its tales could fill a book,

It enters campus, shadows flee,
The profs, they all look ill,
Our tests are banished, happily,
Oh praise the weasel mill!

- David Moore

Programming versification? Weasel manufactories?

Abominations!

Speaking of abominations, does anyone have any good Shakespeare quotes handy?

Weasels should die. Violently.

Deliberate,
Jurors didst,
The weasel's fate,
Within their midst,

Wisdom they sought,
Then quoth she,
"Weasels should die."
"Violently."

“The velocity of the four bar linkage can be determined by... blah blah blah... Then you use drafting triangles to make line at the exact same angle as line one half-way down the page... using your draw a three inch circle and then use your compass to draw a circle with the radius of the length of line 2 then use your protractor to…”

“It you do not know how to solve this graphically you are a shame to yourself, to LeTourneau University and to me.”

quoted from DR. LEE

WHAT YOU DO NOT CARRY drafting triangles, compasses, and protractors AROUND WITH YOU!!!!!

Well, then just plug a matrix into your calculator and hit solve.

Ahhh, the wonderful things one learns in engineering classes!

Ardith:
One might suspect, when one considers, (I hope you will agree),
That running a weasel through a weasel mill would kill it violently?

Randy:
What sort of question's that you're asking, idle and inane?
I've far more Shakespeare than I can quote. Man, are you insane?!

Sharon:
In halls of learning there's always much that can be apprehended,
But if you claim THAT'S wonderful, your speech will be rescinded!

I think I have to declare Wheeler the winner this time. It was a close decision; Moore and Randy did particularly well, I thought. Moore almost earned it with his original poetry, but Wheeler included original poetry too while breaking more rules. So, Wheeler, let me know which professor should get the candy.

It's just gotta be Watson . . . clearly.